Except the Messiah of course! Which He intends us to realize and live our life for. But, it's hard and tough, and the world is just so equipped with the arsenals of making our lives fall down on our knees. Oftentimes, the falling is self infliction and it feels good. Like the flesh gives up its pain from a sucking leeches. It's the impact that could hurt the most because the very people end up hurting is not yourself but those who are purely dearest to you.
Hhhmmm! Forgive my ranting for this is just a forum of my spiraling self.
My mind right now is like a troubled sea also, dancing with the waves. Swayed by the weather. The wind, as erratic as it seemed - reflects my mood. And I am weak - vulnerable at times because I have the solitary tendency. I can almost feel it's clinical already and got got this feeling of detachment from the reality - out of control. Growing like cancer. A plaque in my personality.
I could hardly talk these past few days partly because of too much personal setbacks and job pressures that were put unto my lap. I observe my learning behavior! I just listen like a guy mute from the worst gingivitis ever in his life. While I choose not to utter, my frailty convinced my being over this madness of pretensions. I'm actually taming a monster in me that is capable of spit-firing insults and mockery. He was awaken over the days he's exposed to demons around him, including himself. I foresee a self-destructive power in it that if untamed, will consume the very person in me. And I don't like sad stories because I been through a lot of sad predicaments lately.
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