Termination is Sometimes a Liberation

Well, these past few weeks, I have had an ample of experience. Why so? I suffered a lot of consequences from my past decisions and decadence of attitude. I think I was just too tired over cynical settings inside four walls. The politics is extremely choking. People are robots and are unhappy. When you are unhappy, it shows. When it shows, you are angry and you slime. When you slime you become unlikable. When you are unlikable, you're one of the unlucky ones even if they see you devote your work for their sake and yours.

I realized that, if you can't stick to an organization then you have to pacify the rebel in you. Not too timid in ways but not too carelessly sharp or blunt. it's either you in the wrong organization or it's the organization having you wrongly. Well, I was both probably. It's always self-interest you look up to when joining a company of course.

Positively enough, out of work, does not at all made me feel useless or numb. Termination is sometimes a liberation; especially if you feel the company you're working with is not worth your time and devotion. It's just so unfortunate I have people depending on me. A survey made seemed always true - forty five people are affected when you're income is cut-off.

I always see things differently but positively. Like, I see these days an opportunity to prove my worth to do things independently. Still IT in nature of course, what else am I capable of doing? Other than this one - blogging? But, to tell you honestly, I find it enticing to venture out independent contracting and earn from it. A thing I had experience and been wanting to do in my life. I find earning independently triumphant and extremely self-fulfilling although many challenges may always lay ahead.

Still, politics will always be there but I think I can handle that finely now. Racism, I cannot. At least I don't stink!

Technorati Tags: life,independent contracting,IT career,retrenchments due to economic recession

The Price for Sex

And you thought sex is easy? Let the pictures speaks for itself.

LiveJournal Tags: Cruelty,Human Rights,Human Trafficking,Prostitution,Sex,Woman

My Pay for an Unpaid Evening

Again we were slaves doing the thing we weren't supposed to do or might have done voluntarily do ourselves if we were only given the respect due to us. Mentality of slavery! Although I'm a strong believer that nothing pays more strongly than the respect of your people to do you more extra jobs. A little respect, surmountable motivation and even just a little penny compensate a huge hours of work will matter a lot.

Out of frustration, I among others in my office who were obliged to do work overtime without pay, was a bit desperate for a little recreation. Anything just to get it even with the eye that was probably been staring at us. Remotely, from a security camera the whole night from his comfortable abode.

It's unusual during this time of the night, this exotic and extremely lovely lady came walking towards my post. Two huge guys, probably a brother and a husband behind her back were scanning the displays to purchase. I immediately grabbed my camera and asked her politely if I could make a picture shot at her hand. She was undeniably beautiful and kind. The ones you see in those Hollywood movies about Persian women.

The moment there I was hesitant whether to take a head-shot or not. Slightly lifted my camera up or down, twice or more. Then, I forgot I should have asked permission from the men as well. So I did. Two guys smiled and kindly exclaimed, 'Yes, of course, please do!'. So I did take a picture of her beautiful Henna tattoo - a poetry painted on the hands. And thus, the picture I've attached to this post.

I considered it a privilege of the evening. My pay for an unpaid evening.

(Last photo credits to http://media.collegepublisher.com)

LiveJournal Tags: Asia,Culture,Dubai,Ettiquettes,Poetry,Rant,Work,UAE,Henna Arts

Season of Bad Fate

In as much as I always want to write of happy thoughts and happy affairs. My mood and my spirit is now pulled down by the news of a shootout between the police and the hold-up gang armed with automatic weapons and grenades that took place in Manila just recently (December 7, 2008). A shootout crossfire so deadly it left sixteen people dead including ten of the robbery gang members, the news confirmed.

A father and his seven years old daughter on board a passing sports utility vehicle were hit in the crossfire and few moments later died. They were among the six civilians, collateral on that police operation. The Two other people manning a truck near the office of the transport firm also died from gunshot wounds. And, a men's fashion designer who was just on his way home from a Christmas party was also caught in the cross-fire.

What saddened mo most is the death of the father and the daughter. The father just went home for vacation to be present on his seven years old child's birthday. Who would have thought this dreadful event would left a weeping and wailing mother. A mother full of questions as why her spouse and child had to die. Why has she been left alone now? What would she be doing with her life now - that she's alone. Asked by this mother and wife as she hugged their pillows and kissed her daughter's school ID. What's is not more heart-breaking sight to see than this? And considering the time of the year this fate had occur.

What gives me more discomfort, is the speculations that again the p-o-l-i-c-e again had made some inaccurate mistakes. I have this frustrating doubts and fear that in such cases like this, accuracy of neutralizing situations is a quality questionable from the part of the forces. This is not the first time in the police force, when a civilian is undeniably part of that collateral damage. One civilian always has to die every time their is a shoot out like this one. Containing the situation accurately and swiftly should be a skill to be mastered by our forces to spare the lives of a civilian. One civilian's death is inexcusable. It is excusable because no one will answer to a collateral damage - especially not in the kind of justice system Philippines has.

On the contrary, the criminals, it is them that they would not care who their bullets will hit when they pull some triggers. Imagine an aimless shower of bullets from them - anybody could be hit of course. And they had to be neutralized - swiftly. Nonetheless, a question is asked. From whom did this bullets that ceased the lives of the innocent passers-by come from? Doing ballistic analysis, I wished this question will be answered honestly by the authorities.

LiveJournal Tags: Assault against violence,Christmas,collatera,crime,Family,justice,Opinions,Patriotism,Philippines,Politics,Rant,Safety,Terrorist,Violence

My Coming Christmas Musing

Oh well, Christmas is fast approaching. For an OFW, the season of emphasized loneliness. The season is like a day when the clouds are cleared to expose a sky of a clandestine blue. It's just you in the constellation of loneliness. This is what I feel and been expecting unless the season is feasted with my two small daughters and my wife; and among family members - back home.

It's sometimes sickening because there have been too many discussions about the coming season - it's the most talked about topic in this time of the month. With all these days' fears and tribulations of both economic and socio political. Worsened by recession resulting to rampant lay-offs. There'd be not much food in the table during the Christmas season.

And as far as I want to speak something out of the expected Christmas spirit, it weakens me. But, there is an urging willingness to discover the strength to be out of the blue; appreciate the warmth of others who has probably thought of this same thought; to be content and be  able to count the blessings received during our days.

 

Technorati Tags: Christmas,Faith,Family,Gift,Home,Occasion,Opinions,Party,Jesus Christ

Coherence

Because I am lazy, I always missed out coherence in writing sometimes leading to my own confusion. I usually had to reread several times my posted blogs before I will realize my writing is like an uneven painted wall. I always have a habit of firing words and forget nevertheless, I am comfortable doing it that way. It is the coming back that I always feel awful reading it because I knew then I was not doing a good job. But, rather forgetting the discipline of a writer - coherence.

My mistakes too were attributed to not having observed to select the right words for what I meant. I knew selecting the right words for the things I needed to say has to be precise - giving the correct meaning to my thoughts. Why is the English language not so convenient to use sometimes but rather, how do you call it, meticulously necessary?

Coherence is I think the soul of what we are trying to write. While you give your readers a chance to breath through paragraphing, we make sense through it all by observing coherence. Imagine a torso of a man whose spinal chords are weak, they would appear bendy and the threat that they would fall off. All writing must be in harmony with nature. Breathing like a free flowing water.

I've heard this a millionth of times since my school days. Well, I had few literature teachers, having to speak Carabao English most of the time, is very aware of the coherence in writing. I haven't mastered this technique though. And, I continuously committed the mistake of not having to observe this.

So from definition by ANSWERS.COM:

It is the way a writing is logically layed out and connected. If it was an essay, one thing leads on to another, for example one paragraph leads on to another-the main ideas of each paragraph seem to connect but still make sense. this makes the reader feel that your writing is constantly flowing.

It also means you are very consistent in your writing. consistently and continuously through your writing you can connect each paragraph some how, that you can consistently write concisely as well. You can also consistently write in formal English. You can express yourself clearly and continuously through your essay for example.

Technorati Tags: philippines,Lingua Franca,IELTS,Blogging,Language,Rant,Work,Opinions,Lingua,Stress-out,English

You Are What You Write!

I come into realization that each blog reflects the people who they really are. It is an activity best to describe and read the person's mind - his aspirations in life, his failures and his success. In a way, it's the best arena to learn and prosper; And yet, many people would just like to exist in seclusion so naive they'd fight back any forms of criticism. I think people like me, for them, is just an add-up burden to their crisis in life.

Blogging can be a lonely habit. We insist to disseminate thoughts however obscure it is. And when people tries touch-down on the written thoughts you got invalidations right away. A bad tail - a stalker. Just because a few curious onlookers read your "online diary" does not mean you are in any position to insult.

This is some sort of arrogant bullshit that makes me feel not to participate anymore but doing so risk my plan of pushing forward plans for learning and hopeful friendly collaboration.

If what becomes of me in blogosphere is just another ill-humored blogger, I'm just another dude bringing mediocrity to blogging community. Thus, pulling it down to a square shaped blogosphere. Question remains, why is the novice one bullies amateurs instead of helping them improve? Why is the culture of bullying persistent even in the blogosphere? To some people, blogosphere is a square planet.

Snakes in Blog Hopping

Most snakes are territorial that is why the writer in a blog is comparable to the animal whose behavior sometimes is passive yet character as that of a poisonous and cobra. The thoughts in writings may be enticing for comments but there have been few times I was struck - neck first.

I admit I am just a newby, a wannabe and an amateur but just now I realized how tough is the blogosphere with some of its inhabitants comparable to that of the real world. I am just a cub toying and hurdling around my way through the blog community looking around for nice experiences and friendship. I am a fly-by. And I see your thoughts beautiful. I should have known there are invincible fences set. And, never did I realize there are snakes in blog hopping.

People blogging are sometimes self-imposing, self-righteous and desperately hides their insecurities which I fear anybody like me might end up just like them. I think blogging for this people now are just an excuse for solving their issues in life face front, their laziness and their arrogance. It is always difficult to hang out with arrogant people. It is always unbearable spending or reading thoughts of this people with arrogant belief that they are the only ones having the rights or anything useful to say in this low trust world.

Chaos in Mumbai

 

Who was it that said, "Those who can't think, fight"? I think it was me.
Judy Robinson, Lost in Space 1998

Mumbai, India again was rampaged by terrorist attack today which saddened a lot of Indian expatriates who lived and worked in Dubai. Partly, the bus I rode today has been silenced nor numb by the news which was precipitated rapidly via UAE's mobile network. I honestly sympathized their sentiment just because I have family away from me too. I knew a lot of Indian friends who are good people whose life and daily problems are as same as mine or any other Filipino back home.

I saw one guy, who by his stature is a composed professional, is obviously anxious by trying to contact families and friends whose location could be near the incident zones. Seldom I've seen people inside the bus, strangers, men and women share emotions, concerns and fear of the dreadful event which is every city's enemy.

  Several attacks were implicated and bombarded few of the city's hotels which is can be considered already a financial destinations for both local and foreign investors and a cultural center. The Taj Mahal Hotel and the Oberoi Complex, Mumbai's economic life line and blood. Bombardment of barbarous attacks which had occurred in just few minutes to hours interval in just a single day.

A total chaos expected. Bloodshed. All because of a pointless cause. Cause that has been distorted - now to destroy human life - innocent life. A cause they believed could be answered by grenades and bullets. This is a practice of people whose pride is extremely high beyond their heads, they deny everything democracy has to offer. Even to the extent of becoming ungodly. Even crisscrossed to their own belief. So clearly, those who can't think to settle diplomatic and fundamental issues the smart and humane way, recourse their action to violence and bloodshed.

My home town is no alien to the threat brought about by these acts of terrorism. It is an act so void of reason that it will change a city's emotional and economic landscape in a day time. So damaging it is fitting only that an act injustice to another person should be paid back with life itself.

Obviously, Barack Obama, in his new administration and the rest of the world will face an international tests in the first several months. These war on terror being the most served in the menu of these problems.

"It is evident that the group which carried out these attacks, based outside the country, had come with single-minded determination to create havoc in the commercial capital." - Prime Minister Manmohan Singh, condemning the barbaric act to the highest of term.

You can see how big the scale this incident brought to the city and the nation as a whole here.

Duhali - I Will Write About You

 

 

My Pren!

 

One Pakistani guy was sitting in the ladies section of the bus C2 en-route to Deira today. When the bus made a stop just somewhere near the Muzalla Towers, few ladies rushed in. While there were no more sit for the ladies is available, one lady who has been sitting beside him exclaimed, "my pren, you stay behind!" Hehehe! The guy was point blank. He was I think new in town. Either he does not speak English or he's just dumb clueless. The ladies were staring at him. It took him moments to stood up and went backside. The right remark should have been, "My friend, can you please sit at the back?"

Regardless of what language we speak, we should make an effort to convey what we think as clearly as possible to avoid failure of communication. Even if the guy does not speak English, it's never an excuse just to whack some statement unclear. We speak clearly and directly, some guys might just be able to help us.

This scene so common when one guy is not a so good English speaker having an argument with a local policeman who is seemed having problem speaking or comprehending it too. Anyway, the total dumb and immediate solution to the dispute was the poor guy sent away to jail. "OK Stay there inside bugger!" Hehehe.

Sadly there is this race who just thinks of themselves as high above the others because as they have claimed they speak good English. "O! what a beautiful cobra, taste like chicken!" as my brother jokes it.

Words for Everything

 

So today I changed my blog name to this title. I welcome the old title back. Words for Everything, because it is subtle and embraces the idea of unlimited thought.

English is not my native tongue but learning it is like recursively punching an inches thick slab of wood until my wrist goes through. A violent yet gradual effort involves containing my emotions and my mood dancing with my own heartbeat. I can challenge the language but I'm proud because not very few people can do with mine. The pain really is conveying an idea from my own thought of language and translate them to English. I have to penetrate a mind of an English.

This might also be a response to Gladys' post on naming your web site or a blog name in particular. Indeed, choosing the right site name is one difficult task to be able to start something in the web. My name as the web-site address and Words for Everything as my blog name. What's left not to be understood. It’ll usually take few minutes of thinking before I can come up with something. Regardless of how long your title address might be, it should be something you will be comfortable the whole time if it's intended for blogging. And, best should describe your thinking and that of your audiences or readers.

A Not So Ideal Place to Stay

 

HEHEHEHE!

Tell me if you're interested. You'll never know you might end up in a place like this. It's a headache finding accommodation in Dubai. Rents are rising up annually.

Finding a good company is tough. Many people would like to play important. Few think they're the only people having real problems. Few people would like to use other people. And few likes to be used. There are a-holes and there are those sloppy. Some people are show-offs and arrogance is a culture. Life always stinks!

Nevertheless, earning a living is better here than home but few things are obviously tough. Three things are so tough here. Health insurance, hospitalization, education for children and housing are just so difficult and expensive here.

Everywhere you go, there are problems. Whichever company you work with, there are politics. The locals were oftentimes right; the expatriates never runs out of things to complain about. Something they brought with them from their mother countries. Approach life with less complaints. These kind of things, like opportunities, always has brother of misfortunes. One need just to be content. Never forget what he is back home.

Responsibility and accountability of your actions always pays off. It will always put you on the safe zone. So when trouble is on its way, you'll see it coming. Thus, avoiding it easily. After all, running away from trouble is the best self defense. I'm saying this because messing with the law here is the deepest predicament you could be in.

Try to be content with what you might have already which others are struggling to achieve. Truly, poverty is one's state of being. One should count his blessings everyday. So even if life in Dubai is tough, when the going gets tough, the tough gets going. And, learn to coil in bed when blankets were short off inches.

To Say the Least

Once again I had this rush for posting something about a feeling of helplessness so I said something like this on post to the other blog I had that was quite just an emotional dump site really. So I said, "My thoughts once again or always has been like a river of a never ending first sentences. The words get jammed in the sinkhole until no good phrases is good enough to utter. I'm convinced silence is the best talking which is of course not always an ideal companion.

I always tried to write a story but they either end up like my own life story, which I really don't like talking. They either end up emotional or trying hard to be funny.

10 To Bear Fruits In My Life

 

This is just so I could have a post out of bullet lists. Bullet lists make points, one thing my boss taught me in my career life. So just in life is where it could also be applicable. A picture of my self of what I would reach nor fail to achieve.

1. An educational plan for my children. For them to become doctors or lawyers; The eldest I'd want to work at NASA; the younger one - a Neuro-surgeon; The incoming, probably a boy I wish to become an Aikido Expert but is also an Engineer of some sort. A genetic engineer perhaps.
   
2. A safe, nice and comfortable house. Overlooking the sea and pro-green is a bonus. It should be a house built upon the rock of our Lord of course.
   
3. A second hand family car. It will do - convenience is near necessity nowadays.
   
4. Business/Income. Well, why not? I'd love a farm. This is where my business passion should be. Next, or other business of interest is IT and food export industry.
   
5. A pure, warm and recreationally oriented extended family reunion. A family gathering of some sort, every one collaborating a resolute union of the hearts. A day of forgiveness and rebuilding of trusts.
   
6. A healthy life. Although I'm fond of grilled steaks, I'd love a vegetable and fruit rich diet (One thing my love always want us to have in the dining). I'll try to live more than 70 years of age still vital. Still oozing in sex life. I'm basically an extremely horny creature. Good thing sushi is in the bottom of the must be controlled diets because raw fish in vinegar is a very very favorite.
   
7. A hand-full of hair. Why not? I'd love some make over of myself for my wife.
   
8. Experience New Zealand and its paradise. Well, one place at a time. Let me see what is in store for us there.
   

Kiddo

The boy. The soul in my dream - was a son to me. In my dream, I even thought him how to pee. Like my father used to do when I was little. I had rich memories of my childhood. Like the one I had with my father that day outside our house near the beach that windy afternoon of August .

So here we are holding and pointing each of our own life's 'arsenal'; aiming at something good to pee about. Yep! Hehehe! "There you go!", I said to him. There is a good one to aim at! So that, it forms bubble on the ground as the annoyed gnats just plea their way out of it. He giggled! And giggled! And I smiled a sweet pain. The best laughter I could hear in my entire life. We were playing with the device of God that connects our separate existence. The same laughter I hear from my children later on - but could hardly recognize it.

I can see his over joy now that I can see his tear crawled his face when I told him that it's going to happen not just once but twice or maybe thrice. And yet. Something would be missing because they would grow without me - at least for a while. I was going to be sent away to fight a battle of life. A battle of my own. A battle of today. I was going to fight a war that has to be won no matter what. I was going away for a while - and make a life for all of us - including his. Somehow, out of dimension, there was going to be a law that what you sow in your current life will be sowed backside of your existence, way into the past. And the future you make is... but an apple pie to be shared.

In my dream was a boy, faithful to his future. A moment came the farewell, not understandably the saddest farewell ever. My regret was that I've forgotten to tell him of our endeavors together to coup up life in a bullying world. But then I realized, I was him and I created my own existence.

Dream Kid

Dream is a place where I could always be anything. I could fly across realms. I could lift tons and I could dream make love the sweetest sex of all.

Only in my dream, I can talk to my self as a child. A helpless child - innocent of what his man had become. The best news I uttered to him what has become of him was, when he eighteen years from now, will get to hear from a woman he loved - of a incoming baby. That was for him the most exciting thing to hear; not the news that he was going to suffer a severe alopecia several years ahead; beginning at twenty two; not even excited he was going to be a programmer one day. Somehow he knew this bald man's job is going to suck his life until it ends his pathetic life; Not even the feeling of a first kiss he made with that cute little girl he used to play with round the neighborhood; that was for him to find out - I seemed to understand in his eager face. He was waiting for more.

Something was to be formed eternally special and the best warm he would feel in his entire life was when he would cuddle that small soul of flesh and bone, in his hand. Accidentally, single-handedly, he carried her into his bosom until both arms and saw that never fading picture of a small mouth opened for him. That was... to him seemed like neither a gesture of life for gasping a tiny amount of air or an act of uttering a deafening word because that moment brought him to love the silence of all moments.

After all, while the universe was, made in the words of God, silence preceded in obedience. It is sad how the world wants you to be noisy. It too, wants to play god just for it to be aware of your existence, your contributions to the circumstances and your ego.

Rat Raid

 

Brought by the daily struggle to sort things out in life that were neither important to remember due to forewarning events in life, I feel obliged to log this events into this blog.

Like for example, my house had been raided by rats these few days such that they appear in my dreams. They would appear partying in the kitchen every night. Opening the fridge, grabbing all sorts of consumables around the house, including hair creams.

So, to eradicate, we have to set traps some notorious Actarat on some card boards. The trick was, putting some food in the middle of the cardboard. They will run to it and get pasted to the board. It'd be so hard to get free, so that the more they'll try to get to free, the more they'll get entangled to it. It would cover them completely - helplessly.

These rats were so notorious they climbed up to utensils and eat anything from spices to tooth pastes. The urine just stinks too much that it has become my frequent un-appetizer every morning.

My brother is not just so fond of them but would ran away like a kid. The mouse is one of his not-so-favorite creatures in the house. A fear started when  one day he engulfed a glass of Coca-cola and a cockroach was get caught by it's hair in his mouth so that the roach would now dangle in my brothers face helplessly. It had been a funny day with the roaches since then. And so, all innocent critters of despicable character is now bracketed as a not so exciting creatures of his universe.

So whenever Mickeymouse get caught, I'm always the one who disposes them every night if not my father who is a merciless rodent executioner. An old screw driver is always a convenient tool for his killing. He would pin the head. Ending a little life.

Up until now, I've been looking for ways to at least repel them off my lawn. Like a sensor and frequency bursting device perhaps that would ping radio frequency painful to the rodent's brain. But, until then, we'll have to deal with them with the notorious Actarat.

Pill of Life

 

There's this medicine that came out the news today to help people forget bad experiences in life. A blessing to multitudes of suffering souls that were slaves to their own dark sides, fears that were either self inflicted or caused by another. I, for one should be one inside the bracket because I'm an offender and had caused life miserable to few people and I want to erase the dark side of me. But, I have no right to claim healing because I had caused pain and scars that only life knows. This would be my curse, this would be my ultimate hunger. I used to say I'm a secret book, but I'm no book at all. I'm like the pages soaked from that afternoon rain.

Decay is the ultimate medicine.

Humid Daylight

  

I know why. I myself has to be blamed for yawning several times and falling into sleep while holding the laptop keyboards today. While I lack the discipline, I lack the convenience of going home every day. The climate is overwhelming outside and for people with my built, water is pouring out of me. I don't missed headaches(heat stress)and sticky underarms. Thanks to ever handy Deodorants.

 I always imagined it this way when I was still home. I always imagined the stressful life in this city while I dreamed of putting up my own software outsourcing business back there but I lack the skill of the trade. So what I got to do? I must scope some handful of experience of how to do the business the right way. Who knows? I might tag some people's business along on the way home. But not just yet.

I was walking on my way to my bus stop this afternoon. It seemed like four o'clock still in the afternoon but its not - it's already seven o'clock. This summer heat is just so wearying and tiring. And the humidity is high. I think 37 degrees up in scale.

So today I went home by Bus 19 which routes its way from Al Karama , Bur Dubai and Diera. Went off the office at 6:16PM and arrived home at 9:00 PM. So you can just imagine what I'm going through every day.  The trip with so much traffic is that terrible here. On the way to the office is same as worse.

• Tinawagan n'yo ako this morning, nirecord ko dialog natin with the girls, ngkakagulo at ang sayang-saya nyo.
• On the way outside ng office, treneat ko muna si Humam ng malamig na Mango Juice ng Sendan, nagustuhan ng Iraqui. Nalaman ko na 'man-ga' din pala tawag nila sa mannga doon sa Iraq.
• 'Chemical Ali' Genocidal maniac; underdog of Saddam sentenced to death today.
• Learned new things in programming today.
• Adequate amount of water intake daily, enhances concentration and boosts memory functions.
• Ni-review ko NZ application today, pwde pa dw. Same as tough as before. I'm still dreaming of NZ.